Evening Thoughts 7 June 2013 – Forres, Scotland

A week at Cluny Hill in Forres, Scotland – one of the two Findhorn Foundation sites here in Northern Scotland. The past two days have been sunny, much to everyone’s surprise. And the gardens so well associated with Findhorn are verdant in shades of green that offer tantalizing hints of summer flower and vegetable displays.

Earlier in the week a group of us spent the morning on a beach on the Moray Firth. One of our group is Norwegian, and we could imagine the Firth opening up to the North Sea and heading towards Bergen, Norway, area of relatives of my grandmother. When you look at maps, you can easily see the proximity of Norway as you can see the proximity of the north of Ireland in relation to Scotland and feel the natural water passages back and forth that led to the northern European mix of culture and history. What a rich DNA stew.

When traveling I find it curious to note that every once in a while I see someone who not only looks, but also has mannerisms of someone I know from home. Sometimes it is eerie. Does this mean that these people are somehow related?

Last week in a restaurant I saw a man who reminded me very me very much of both my father and my brother at a certain age. He was in a lively discussion and his mannerisms were like them as well. I almost went up and asked him where he was from. But really, this seems a bit excessive doesn’t it? I know I am on this pilgrimage, but I don’t think it wise to accost strangers in restaurants just to satisfy my wish to learn about my family.

What I am discovering is a genuine love of the land and waterways. And a natural affinity to the people. For the most part I have experienced friendliness and helpfulness.

I am also interested to note that when I talk with a few about my pilgrimage and not knowing about when and were my Scottish ancestors traveled to the US, more and more I hear stories about Scots who stayed and also feel a sense of loss and separation from not knowing about their kin who disappeared across the sea.

I am not so preoccupied with knocking on doors of people named Gillespie to see if we are related, but to repair some of these threads that have been torn and let the fabric of my family history find meaning.

But there is also the connection with nature. I still find it uncanny about the landscape I traveled through, Badenoch is supposedly a historic Gillespie region. It is like my childhood memories of Colorado and Wyoming. And, this segment of land and sea from Bergen, Norway through Moray Firth and River Spey though Badenoch to Lochaber and the Firth of Clyde, Hebrides Islands to Northern Ireland. and represents grandmother Norway and grandfather Scotland. How is it even possible that they would meet in the US and have these earlier geographical relationships?

In my time at Findhorn I met not only a Norwegian, but also a woman from Colombia, both connecting with their Celtic roots. The three of us together discovering in the place of origin not exactly answers, but certainly clues. And because of our related quests we have become adopted cousins along the way. Is this part of our present day family history?

There is much more to this than I can fathom in this moment.

But on a personal note, Steve gave me a heart-shaped rock to take with me from Crescent Beach and while scouting the cliffs at the Moray Firth beach I discovered an igneous rock with pockets in it and the heart-shaped stone fit perfectly in one of them.